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Septic Bucket List: A Bucket List You Don’t Want to Miss

Dating an astronaut. Becoming an astronaut. Learning to speak Swahili. Your bucket list may be packed with all kinds of glorious things you want to do before you die; some tangible, some fantastical and some just for the fun of the thought.

And the thought of certain activities can be much more exciting that actually completing them. Think climbing Mount Everest or breeding lemurs.

That makes the traditional bucket list a bit impractical. The traditional list also has another factor working against it. Although the phrase and concept of a bucket list have been kicking around for years (excuse the pun), the term really roared into regular use after the release of the 2007 movie of the same name.

Subsequent mentions on TV shows that range from “Glee” to “NCIS” further cemented the concept into popular culture. And when anything soars into popular culture, you know what needs to happen next.

It’s time to rebel.

Enter ‘The Septic Bucket List’

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The Boy with Moldy Cheese Pizza Under His Bed: Second edition out now

The Boy with Moldy Cheese Pizza Under his Bed: by Ryn Gargulinski

Remember when people got maimed, mangled or killed in fables instead of coddled and pampered and sent to live happily ever after? THE BOY WITH MOLDY CHEESE PIZZA UNDER HIS BED harkens back to those good ole days with a scary story that carries an incredible moral. It’s not a book you want to read to your kid right before bed — or perhaps ever. Enjoy. 

Why I Created It

I’ve always been a huge fan of Aesop and fables that come with a hard-hitting moral, not those that come dressed-up with frogs that get kissed into princes. Two folks get credit for inspiring this book:

  • Real-life high school classmate, who shall remain nameless, who did, indeed have moldy cheese pizza under his bed.
  • Tucson poet and writer Andrew Ulanowski, named in the book’s dedication. He encouraged me to write down the tale and this moldy cheese pizza book was born.

3 Reasons You Want It

  • Beats out the present day’s cleaned-up fairy tales (excuse the pun) where everyone lives happily ever after
  • Doesn’t contain any impossibly thin or beautiful princesses that sit around whining their lives are so awful
  • Sneaky way to get kids to clean their rooms 

Mentions and Kudos

  • An Amazon reviewer of the first edition evidently got really pissed off, started spurting about Satan and then gave it one star. That alone should pump up curiosity – hahaha.
  • Tucson’s KVOA TV station gave THE BOY WITH MOLDY CHEESE PIZZA UNDER HIS BED a nod, even including the word “grim” in the headline (Thanks, KVOA!)

Where to Get It

The second edition has a green cover and professional binding, different from the first edition’s white cover and staples. You’ll also notice a slight shortening of the title’s wording from The Boy Who Had Moldy Cheese Pizza Under His Bed to The Boy with Moldy Cheese Pizza under His Bed.

Online and nationwide:

In Tucson: