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Same-sex marriage hassles include gifts: Problem solved with same-sex wedding Lucky Voodoo Doll couples

From “His” and “Hers” towel sets to “His” and “Hers” china cups that cost too much and no one uses, there is no dearth of wedding gifts for the bride and groom.

The happy groom and groom same-sex wedding Lucky Voodoo Dolls/Art and photo Ryn Gargulinski

But when it comes to same-sex marriages, finding suitable presents for the groom and groom or the bride and bride can be a bit of a challenge.

Enter Same-Sex Marriage Lucky Voodoo Dolls.

Continue reading Same-sex marriage hassles include gifts: Problem solved with same-sex wedding Lucky Voodoo Doll couples

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Woman tries to cut tattoo off boyfriend’s neck, man eats his own beard and more – Rynski radio – UPDATE with playlist, download

Getting a tattoo of your beloved’s name always comes with some risks if there’s a breakup or a fight – especially when the fight results in a girlfriend trying to cut her name off her boyfriend’s neck.

This guy went for a smarter neck tattoo that didn't involve a name/Thinkstock

That story and more are up this week on Rynski’s Shattered Reality radio show on Party934.com and FM 94.9 in Hudson Valley, N.Y.

Next show is Wednesday, Nov. 17 (today!) and every Wednesday online at Party934.com. Showtime is 1 p.m. in Arizona, 3 p.m. EST.

Party 934 is a radio alternative for listeners sick of stations that play one song followed by 500 commercials.

Songs that mention family are up once again, as is the weekly polka fix and a tuneful array of requests.

Thanks! to all who offer suggestions.

What: Rynski’s Shattered Reality Internet radio show
When: Every Wednesday for one hour
Time: 1 p.m. in Arizona, 3 p.m. EST
Where: www.party934.com and FM 94.9 in Hudson Valley

CALL FOR SONGS – DREAMS – Got a favorite song that mentions dreams, dreaming – or even nightmares? You name it, we’ll try to find it and play it.

Missed the show? CLICK HERE to download

Playlist for Rynski’s Shattered Reality 11/17:

Theme: Family, part 2 of 2

Alanis Morissette – Unprodigal Daughter

Polish Sausage Polka (polka always for parents, this one esp. for dad on birthday)

Jane’s Addiction – Had a Dad

Lucky Millinder – I Want a Tall Skinny Papa

The Rolling Stones – Sister Morphine (All Stones for Deb in AZ)

The Runaways – Little Sister

Elvis Presley – Little Sister (Radmax in AZ)

Paul Simon – Mother and Child Reunion (Mary Jane in NY)

Mott the Hoople – I Wish I Was Your Mother (Alan in Kent, WA)

The Rolling Stones – Have You Seen Your Mother, Baby (Deb in AZ)

Jethro Tull – Cheap Day Return (Beezel)

The Doors – The End (abridged version)(Pierre in AZ)

Slayer – Human Disease from Bride of Chucky Soundtrack (Bill in MI)

Pearl Jam – Release (Leslie in MI)

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Elephant poop makes money in Topeka – Could Tucson follow suit with coyote and javelina waste?

Scooping up elephant dung – or any poop – may not be the most glamorous job. Unless you happen to have some kind of fetish.

This baby's a money making machine/Ryn Gargulinski

But it can be an endeavor that leads to piles of money if we take a lesson from the Topeka Zoo.

This Kansas animal haven has started a project called My Pet Poo, which turns pachyderm poop into festive little dolls, geegaws and other brightly-painted gift items.

Some come affixed with beads and baubles while all of them come with a certificate of authenticity to insure what you’re getting is the real scoop.

Don’t worry – the poopy little gifts won’t leave nasty rings on your tables or shelving units. The elephant dung is first dried out for about 10 days then coated with an airtight acrylic paint, carefully layered on the poop by dedicated zoo volunteers, AOL News notes.

While volunteers paint the poo, they seemed to have drawn the line at molding the feces as one would mold Play Doh or clay. All figures are left in their natural state, usually roundish or dome-shaped.

A final layer of shellac tops off the process to insure the knickknack doesn’t crumble apart or stink.

These gorgeous gifties sell from $10 to $25 each at the zoo’s Leopard Spot Gift Shop or $35 online with shipping thrown in. Custom orders are welcome.

We bet these fine treasures are selling like hotcakes, or at least meadow muffins.

Wish someone would have mentioned this idea when I had a New Mexico yard full of five goats.

Since Tucson and so many other cities are in such dire budget straits, perhaps the same type of waste-to-riches theory could work in a variety of areas around the nation.

Fast cash for javelina scat?/File photo Tucson Citizen

The Topeka Zoo already debuted the elephant waste, so it would be best if each region had its own unique take on the recycled money machines.

Tucson’s coyote and javelina scat would be quite fetching as artwork, although the former is often littered with small bone chunks and the latter could be tough – or downright dangerous – to collect.

Javelinas have a bad reputation ever since a cornered one went after a Dutch tourist at the Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum, ripping open the man’s arm, leg and causing permanent numbness, nerve and muscle damage.

Maybe we’ll stick to the coyotes.

New Mexico could have a heyday with the goats, as long as the artisans tend toward art that works well with pellet shapes. And imagine the very large possibilities from those grizzly bears in Colorado.

Turning dog doo into art could work anywhere. It would also give some dog owners the boost they need to properly clean up after their pets and instantly provide all those pooper scooper services with an automatic dual income.

Who’d a thunk a hunk of elephant dung in Topeka could spark such a grand idea – and maybe even a way to get the American economy out of the toilet once and for all.

[tnipoll]


Ryn Gargulinski is a poet, artist, performer and TucsonCitizen.com Ryngmaster who has made art out of fur and garbage, but never out of dryer lint or poo. Her column appears every Friday on Rynski’s Blogski. Her art, writing and more is at RynRules.com and Rynski.Etsy.com. E-mail rynski@tucsoncitizen.com.

What do you think?

Is the My Pet Poo hilarious or disgusting – or both?

Did you ever have a pet rock?

What other strange things have you seen made into art or done with poo?

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Police sell panties for profit, rats invade Toledo and more – Rynski radio – UPDATE with playlist and download

Police departments across the globe are suffering from budget cuts, but cops in England found a quick way to raise some cash. They are selling panties, lingerie and other racy items at auction.

Pet rats Bobo and the late Pierre would never dream of invading Toldeo/Ryn Gargulinski

That story and more are up this week on Rynski’s Shattered Reality radio show on Party934.com and FM 94.9 in Hudson Valley, N.Y.

Next show is Wednesday, Oct. 6 (today!) and every Wednesday online at Party934.com. Showtime is noon in Arizona, 3 p.m. EST.

Party 934 is a radio alternative for listeners sick of stations that play one song followed by 500 commercials.

Tucson, New York City and Winchester Cathedral are a few fine areas you’ll hear tunes about with this week’s musical theme of places. And don’t forget the weekly polka fix.

Thanks, as always, to those who contributed suggestions.

Requests for future shows welcome; please leave them below.

What: Rynski’s Shattered Reality Internet radio show
When: Every Wednesday for one hour
Time: Noon in Arizona, 3 p.m. EST
Where: www.party934.com and FM 94.9 in Hudson Valley

CALL FOR SONGS for 10/20 show – Those that mention ANIMALS. Dogs, cats, sharks, rats – all critters, creatures and yes, even songs about roadkill (you’re welcome, Radmax). You name we’ll try to find it and play it. Please leave suggestions below.

Missed the show? CLICK HERE to download

Playlist for Rynski’s Shattered Reality 10/6:

Theme: Places

David Bowie – Panic in Detroit (Marcia in MI)

The Beatles – Get Back (AZMouse in AZ)

Eddy Grant – Electric Avenue (for the heck of it)

A-Bones – Shallow Grave (KoreyK in AZ)

New Vaudeville Band – Winchester Cathedral (Radmax in AZ)

Clash – London Calling (Linda in UK)

Taco – Puttin’ on the Ritz (Kathy in mystery locale)

Bingo – House Polka (polka always for parents)

Mountain – Mississippi Queen (Beezel)

M – Pop Muzik (Julie in MI)

The Rolling Stones – Shattered (Stones fan Deb in AZ)

Serge Gainsbourg – New York, New York USA (LePetit in AZ)

Due to way too many cool songs left over, PLACES will be the theme again next week. Will use ANIMAL requests for following week – thanks!

What do you think?

Has your home ever been invaded by rats, mice, cockroaches or other fun critters?

Have you ever lived in Toledo?

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Pigs are people, too: Animal abuse, haters and worldly woes quashed in debut cartoon video by two Tucsonans

Tucson talent rocks. Evidence includes funky trash cans on Fourth Avenue, mosaics on highway overpasses and now an animated music video produced by Tucson’s own Eric Heithaus with art by yours truly, Ryn Gargulinski.

Please enjoy watching “Everyone I Know Needs Love” as much as we enjoyed creating it.

Main character Dollie is a cartoon I drew years ago, inspired by Quint’s line in “Jaws” about a shark’s eyes being like a doll’s eyes.* Doggy is my standard dog image that resembles my dog Phoebe yet also works to embody every dog in the world.

Dollie and Doggy/Art Ryn Gargulinski

This is my first illustrated animation project and one on a long list of Eric’s successful music – and other – productions.

The only other time my artwork has moved around on its own was during a horrific nightmare where all creatures in my house and backyard started attacking me.

It is much more pleasant when such critters are captured in a little box on the screen.

Thanks! Eric for working with me and coming up with this idea while vacationing on a San Diego beach. The video, all told and in between day jobs, took about a year to complete.

I’m posting the full press release that goes with the video below, which gives you more on the story and where we’re both coming from.

P.S. If you cannot tell from the video, we are both avid animal lovers. The partnership mentioned at the beginning of the clip, “Sawyer and Mr. Angel Association,” is named after our dogs.

PRESS RELEASE:

PIGS ARE PEOPLE, TOO

Animal abuse, haters and worldly woes quashed in debut cartoon video

Animal abuse leads to people abuse – we don’t need a rocket scientist to tell us that. We don’t need a rocket scientist to come up with a way to stop it, either. We just need a wacky artist working with a creative music video producer to come up with a funky, fanciful story of two cartoon characters bent on saving the world.

Oh, yeah – we also need a bomb.

The story

Haters are everywhere – and our heroic cartoon duo of Dollie and Doggie make it their mission to stop it. The sweet team starts off thrown in a garbage can, from whence they scamper only to witness a litany of animal abuses. Horses pureed to pulp in a glue factory. Pigs slaughtered for sausage. A puppy mill. The animal abuse works as an analogy for the people abuse, maltreatment and general hatred that saturates the world at large. The video’s song, “Everyone I Know Needs Love,” offers a hint of the solution in store.

The cartoon video collaboration

Dollie and Doggie star in the video, a project born from the twisted collaboration between two Tucsonans. Producer Eric Heithaus worked on the music and animation end of the project. He produced the catchy “Everyone I Know Needs Love” song with pianist Sly Slipetsky and vocalist Angel Diamond, as well as toiled long hours making a stuffed pig fly. Artist Ryn Gargulinski worked equally as hard creating a cast of cartoon characters that always seem to look like they just got hit by a truck. We think it must be one of her trademarks.

The producer

Tucsonans Eric Heithaus and his wife, Amy, are the masterminds behind Heithaus Productions. While their company has produced everything from documentaries to news and features, it is now focusing on music videos. Eric’s music video production tops competitors as he not only produces the video portion, but he’s a talented music producer. His successes include Tucson’s colorful and creative street musician Black Man Clay, vocalist Laura Ward and his band Children of Gods. More at www.heithaus-productions.com

The artist

Ryn Gargulinski, Tucson resident, Michigan native and longtime New Yorker, has her own list of successes and talents. Writing and art have long topped the list, but this video marks her premiere animated project. Other credits include two illustrated humor books: “Bony Yoga” and “Rats Incredible,” both published by Conari, dozens of news and feature articles, a weekly column and myriad artwork published in a variety of newspapers and journals from New York City to India. Her current gigs include writing four blogs for TucsonCitizen.com and her art business of RYNdustries. More at www.rynrules.com and www.rynski.etsy.com

WATCH the video on YouTube at www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-oVcJf-yCI at  Heithaus Productions at http://heithaus-productions.com/everyone-i-know-needs-love/ or on Rynski’s Blogski.

Contact producer Eric Heithaus at ericheithaus@hotmail.com and Ryn at rynski@tucsoncitizen.com

*Quint’s doll’s eyes quote: “And, you know, the thing about a shark… he’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn’t seem to be living… until he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then… ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin’. The ocean turns red, and despite all the poundin’ and the hollerin’, they all come in and they… rip you to pieces.”

[tnipoll]


What do you think?

Are you a fan of music videos? Of cartoons?

Is is just me or are today’s cartoons quite lame compared to the cool ones we used to get?

P.S. A cashier at Best Buy yesterday looked confused when I mentioned “The Flintstones.”

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