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How to Deal with Jerks using Mental Floss

difficult people mental floss

Even if you work from home, shop at supermarkets in the dead of night, and only go outside after making sure no one else is around for miles, sooner or later you’re going to run across a jerk. Instead of running for cover, you can stand your ground confidently if you use a handy dandy tool called Mental Floss.

Mental Floss is one of 12 tools found in the Little Book of Big Jerks: Fast, Fun Illustrated Guide for Dealing with Difficult People. This post is an excerpt from the book. Enjoy!

What is Mental Floss?

Similar to dental floss but for the brain, mental floss cleans out built-up crud that’s been deposited by difficult people over time. Leave the crud to fester, and your mind’s deep pockets and crevices are subject to decay – or worse.

You could find yourself behaving as negatively as Nellie, as woefully as William, or begging for favors as vehemently as Gina.

How it Works:

Imagine a long, thin piece of floss that you insert in one ear and out the other. Grasp one end of the strand in each hand, pulling it back and forth several times while it’s stretched taut through your skull. Make a swishing sound for added effectiveness.

Your mental floss can be waxed or unwaxed, any flavor you like. Dispose of floss promptly after use so your pets don’t accidentally get ahold of it and choke.

mental floss

Find the mental floss marvelously helpful? Check out 11 other tools for dealing with difficult people in Rynski’s Little Book of Big Jerks.

Get your very own autographed copy today!

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Jerk o’ the Week: Woeful William

woeful william common jerk

The following is an excerpt from the Little Book of Big Jerks to give you a sneak peek at the types of jerks you’ll meet inside the guide to dealing with difficult people.

Woeful William

Just like everything King Midas touched turn to gold, everything Woeful William touches turns to, well, crap. This guy is a magnet for really bad luck.

His roof leaks. His car stalls. His pants rip. His cat hates him. At one time you actually had sympathy for the chap until you read somewhere that people with woeful outlooks actually cause their own bad luck. Now you just feel like shaking him.

3 Giveaway Traits:

  • Inspired a record number of sad country songs
  • Has had a long lineup of pets that hated him, died tragically, or both
  • Always has an empty chair on either side of him at group lunches and dinners

How to Deal:

Leave at least two empty chairs between yourself and him.

How Else to Deal:

Check out the cool jerk-fighting tools in the Little Book of Big Jerks. Real-life solutions for dealing with real-life jerks.