Vampires are hot.
But don’t take it from me, the one addicted to blood, gore and true crime – take it from the slew of movies and TV shows that feature the dark and strangely sultry beings.
Twilight. The Vampire Dairies. Let the Right One In. Underworld: Rise of the Lycans. Lesbian Vampire Killers.
We also have more than 20 vampire movies or TV series coming out within the next two years, according the Suburban Vampire blog.
As popular as these demon creatures are, actually being a vampire is definitely overrated. Sure, they get to sleep in coffins and wear really keen capes, but there are way too many drawbacks.
They have to stay in the dark. Those of us who suffer from SAD, or Seasonal Affective Disorder, would agree that lack of sunlight would be a living hell. Sure, our skin may reap the benefits of avoiding the harmful rays, but if a little winter makes us depressed imagine what an eternity of only darkness would do.
They can’t eat garlic. It’s hard enough getting a restaurant to comply with our wishes of no butter or mayo – think if we had to order things without garlic. All Italian food would be out, as would garlic bread, garlic knots and that really spicy chili I just crock potted. Food would be tasteless and bland.
They are junkies. The thirst for blood may, at a glance, seem really neat-o. But if we really examine it, it is more than a mere thirst. It’s an addiction – an obsession. Their lust for blood rules their lives and is the only thing on their minds. How annoying. Beyond annoying. It could be deadly. We’ve seen drug and alcohol addiction kill off some of our favorite musicians. We’ve seen what an alleged addiction to sex did to Tiger Woods.
They are immortal. We think a lifetime of Mondays is bad? Think of an eternity of Mondays. That would get old real quick. Especially if we spent all of Monday – and the entire week – seeking our next blood fix.
Don’t get me wrong – we can still admire, be enthralled by or even lust after these shuddersome beings. But we also must remember how annoying it would be to be a vampire before we let one kiss us sweetly on the neck.
This blog was inspired by a recent viewing of the movie Blade, which my boyfriend left at my house for several months before he could finally talk me into watching it. It was actually pretty good.
Are you a fan of vampires?
What was the best/worst vampire movie or show you’ve seen? Why?
Would you want to be a vampire? What about a werewolf?follow rynski: