sawyer

An Internet sucker born every millisecond: Falling victim to the latest online scam

Now that people have become wise to Nigerian money scam e-mails and “click here” buttons that infect computers with the latest virus, deceptive online practices are getting sneakier.

One sucked me in the other day, promising I could win $1,000 if I submitted a cute photo of my pet. Since I obsess over my dog Sawyer to the point of probably needing psychological help, I chomped on that offer with a few clicks of the mouse, a submission form, and uploading one of the 5,428 endearing photos I have of the pooch.

One thousand dollars could buy a heck of a lot of dog treats.

The junk e-mail began immediately. I was first encouraged to tell all my friends, family members and people I might have passed on the street 12 years ago to vote for my dog’s endearing photo. After all, I was told, the only way I could win that $1,000 was to amass the most votes from fellow Internet suckers.

Anyone who wanted to vote, of course, had to fill out their own submission form that disclosed their name, e-mail, phone number, blood type, shoe size and date of birth. They would then be immediately slammed with their own set of junk e-mail.

New dog barking ordinance promotes hate, animal cruelty

Dog owners beware: your barking pooch could land you in court – or worse – thanks to a new Pima County barking ordinance that goes into effect May 5.

Under the new ordinance just passed by the Pima County Board of Supervisors, dog barking complaints will bring stricter penalties.

The same fines of $50 to $500 per day still stand, but the complaint process is sped up and, if found guilty of two violations, owners could find themselves in justice court where judges are free to dispense punishment as they see fit.

Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

Such harsh penalties for a barking dog ranks right up there with the $250,000 fine and five years in prison promised by the federal government for the heinous crime of using a rented or personal DVD for profit.

Since my dog Phoebe’s nickname happens to be “Phoebladine the Barking Machine,” you may guess we are not in favor of this new rule.

Neither is a Tucson schnauzer and his dog pal Sadie.

“Although my human strives to keep my girl Sadie and I quiet when she’s home, we are free to do as we please when she isn’t home and now we fear that we’re going to end up costing her money one day by just being who we are and protecting our property,” the dogs’ owner writes in an e-mail.

“Everyone gets walked up and down our blocks, and Sadie is the self-appointed block crier (or more accurately barker) that passes along the call to the dogs on the next block. If it’s really juicy I join in. There are many dogs on our block, every house has at least one, so we can hear when someone’s coming and get ready for the fun. But now we fear that the dogless people walking by, or just about anyone, may find our greetings annoying enough to file a complaint that could penalize our human. Or even send her to jail.”

These fears are valid, especially in an era rife with intolerance and neighborly hate. Phoebe is nowhere near a 24-hour barker, either, but who is to say how far some folks will go to simply be malicious.

Another huge fear stemming from this ordinance is that it could promote animal cruelty.

Owners that do deserve the repercussions of such an ordinance are likely to be neglectful to begin with. Threaten them with even harsher penalties and the results could be disastrous.

A poor rescue pooch that used to frequent Brandi Fenton Dog Park actually had his vocal cords removed. The new owner said he came that way. The dog still wanted to bark, and tried to, producing a sad, raspy noise that left him wholly confused and distraught.

Taping a dog’s mouth shut with duct tape is another act of cruelty that may become an option. One man I knew did it to a dog he was watching for the weekend. He first stuck the barking dog outside in his SUV until the neighbors called the cops. He then taped the dog’s mouth shut and shoved the pooch in the closet.

Such cruelty was also the case for at least one dog that ended up in the Pima Animal Care Center. “Someone had taped her mouth shut with duct tape, shot her with an arrow and was suffering from a very serious eye infection,” a writeup on the PACC website says.

Nice.

Yes, a dog that barks incessantly is a nuisance and some type of ordinance should be in place to help deter it.

But if such severe penalties are a possibility, we need a narrower definition of “incessantly” and what constitutes a violation.

Dog-barking violations are already the top complaint flooding into Pima Animal Care Center. Pushing all those violations to justice court will clog up the system even worse than it already is.

Please note, too, proceeds from the violations go to the Pima Animal Care Center. We would hope a nice yard sale or dog ice cream social fundraiser would be a better way to make some money.

[tnipoll]

What do you think?

Is the new ordinance too harsh?

Have you had problems with barking dogs, either owning or reporting them?

Whatever happened to talking to the neighbor about the problem rather than running to authorities?

What the heck is a Far-log? VIDEO

Some may dream of riches. Others may dream of Jeannie. Local guy Andrew Farley dreamed of the Far-log.

Andrew Farley with his Far-log/Ryn Gargulinski

The Far-log is a self-contained campfire, a fire log that works on the concept of convection.

Thanks to a hole down the center of the log, the wood burns from in the inside out, making it safer than a scattered campfire and longer-burning than your average log.

First developed in 2008, the Far-log has come a long way. Farley created an easy fuse lighting system and even branched into Far-log key chains based on the gas station restroom key holders. It doesn’t get much cooler than that.

The ideas keep on burning.

Currently made of cottonwood, mesquite and a variety of wood in various shapes and sizes, Farley is working with a friend in Guatemala to create the Tiki Far-log made of palm trees.

Far-logs work well for cooking, especially for hot dogs, corn, marshmallows and the cow hearts Farley likes to feed his dog. They can heat up the whole backyard with the handy Johnson Attachment (JA) and make a fine centerpiece for any burning ritual.

Break out that sage.

For more info, click here to join the Facebook Far-log Fan Page.

What do you think?

Is the Far-log the greatest thing since sliced bread?

What other cool inventions have you seen lately?

Tickled with a day trip to Tubac: Slide show

Be ready for some fine art, funky art, wacky art and crappy art if you ever take a trek to Tubac.

Tubac rates high as a fun, funky day trip/Ryn Gargulinski

We have this strange feeling Tubac may be an artists’ haven.

Nestled about 50 miles south of Tucson, Tubac makes for a great day trip as long as you don’t get befuddled by the kilometer signs that line Interstate 19.

While art and a few strange hotels are the showcases of the main drag, you can also go exploring off the path.

A stop at a state historical park lets you check out its fine display of Flintstone wheels. You may even encounter gads of Boy Scouts who are probably completing a troop project yet still take time out to stare weirdly at your dog.

A trek through a forgotten, vacant lot gives you a glimpse of what it would be like to live among the Clampetts of Beverly Hillbilly fame.

A surprise find of a dog park gives you a glimpse of some very selfish people (Sawyer will be blogging on that one).

When all that gets mundane, get back to the art.

While some of the creations, like the $76,000 giant moose, may be a bit out of most people’s price range, you can find less expensive goodies in the throngs of knickknack shops. You can even find birdhouses made out of cowboy boots.

Just steer clear of the wide array of life-size bronze children statues as they tend to be very creepy. They resemble kids who were caught mid-play by a volcano and baked into place.

Check out the baked children and other tantalizing Tubac tidbits in the slide show below.

[tnislideshow]

Highlight: Scouting out the vacant lots and hidden parts of town – although the art places a very close second.

Lowlight: When Sawyer got stuck on the stairway from hell, a narrow, stone stairwell that led upwards with promise only to be blocked by a tiny wooden door. He panicked for a moment, refusing to walk backwards down the stairs, until he finally figured out how to turn around. Then he sped so fast away from the stairs that he knocked me and my camera backwards off the steps.

Overall day trip rating despite the stairwell from hell (1-10): 14.4

[tnipoll]

What’s your take on Tubac?

What’s your favorite Tucson day trip?

What’s your favorite type of art?

Do you enjoy scouring vacant lots?

The good, the bad, the ugly: Pumpkin winner, Paranormal Activity review and demonic possession

What do pumpkins, demons and a really crummy movie have in common? They are all mentioned in this post. Enjoy.

AZMouse's prize mini sugar skull/Art and photo Ryn Gargulinski

The good

Congrats to AZMouse for winning TC.com’s Pumpkin Decorating Contest. Her scary scarecrow and coyly peeking pumpkin took the win with 39 percent of the 33 votes. Jennatoolz’s Hungry Demon was a close second with 36 percent, while entries from KoreyK and Radmax tied at 12 percent each.

Thanks so much to all who entered their creative creations. Sawyer says AZMouse wins Rynart — a mini sugar skull named Terry Jr., which I fashioned after the Terry Sr. skull she admired in a previous post (unless, of course, she would prefer burnt pumpkin seeds).

The bad

Paranormal Activity has been running away with box office sales. More than 1 million folks voted for the movie to go nationwide after its debut as a midnight-only flick in limited areas. Roger Ebert calls it “an ingenious horror film. It’s so well made it’s truly scary.”

Are folks so used to today’s incredibly wide array of crappy films that Paranormal Activity actually looks good?

This flick features a young couple who have enough cash to buy a house in San Diego although they never seem to go to work. They are too busy playing around with a video camera to try and capture the evil force they believe is invading their home and has been following the chick around her whole life. Ninety-nine percent of the movie is watching them sleep – or at least try to.

Even if the stars of the flick can’t sleep as some invisible, three-toed demon tramps through talcum powder down their hallway, the audience certainly can.

Paranormal Activity is truly a yawn. Yes, the premise is thrilling – what’s not to like about the possibility of demonic possession? But the execution is not. In fact, you kind of hope there will be an execution to speed things up a bit.

Perhaps that’s a bit unfair. The audience does stay awake. It’s hard to sleep, after all, when we were treated to that same choppy, disoriented, and headache-inducing camera work that has unfortunately become so popular following the Blair Witch Project.

You know the stuff: unfocused images, zooms to the corner of the ceiling, watching people’s torsos while they speak since the camera just so happens to be focused on their abdomens rather than their faces. It’s enough to make you seasick.

Highlight: Hope. Hope is the only thing keeping the audience alive. You hope something will soon happen. You hope you’ll get to see the three-toed demon. You hope this thing is winding down already.

Lowlight: Not being able to take a bathroom break since you don’t want to miss the possibility of some three seconds of action that you hope will happen soon.

Another lowlight: Rumor has it Paramount is talking about a sequel. Jaws 5, anyone?

Rating (1 to 10): 3.

While it’s not the worst movie I’ve seen lately, we are still annoyed we didn’t opt for our second choice about the weed-eating zombies.

Demonic possession may sound fun but really isn't/Art and photo Ryn Gargulinski

The ugly

Demonic possession, although a thrilling concept, is not a very pretty thing. It’s quite rare, but common enough to pay attention. Below please find several warning signs of demonic possession taken from the very lengthy lists at Foundation for the Study of Paranormal Phenomena.

The site also warns: “Never mention to someone undergoing personality changes that they might be possessed. You can plant a dangerous seed by doing that.”

You may also offend them, no?

Hey, Ethel, you’re not acting like your usual self. Are you maybe possessed by a demon?

Warning signs of demonic possession:

Changes in personality, sleep patterns, weight gains or loss, lots of cussing, preoccupation with sex and aversion to religious objects or going to church.

Bad hygiene, change in what they eat or how they dress, outbursts of violence and hurling cats against the wall, nightmares and peeing on themselves.

Change in eye color, hair color, facial features, a habit of “gliding” along instead of walking, suddenly blessed with many talents, such as moving objects around a room, speaking languages they never studied or being able to levitate.

Have a nice day.

[tnipoll]

What do you think?

Did you see Paranormal Activity? Are you going to?

Is it worth all the hoopla?

What’s the best demonic movie possession you’ve seen?

Did you ever meet someone possessed by a demon?

Happiness is a decorated pumpkin – tips, tricks and contest

Pumpkins are one of the keenest things to decorate, a perfect canvas for ghoulish faces, scary scenes or a pair of skeletal dogs modeled after Sawyer and Phoebe.

Phoebe and Sawyer/Art and photo by Ryn Gargulinski — Phoebe and Sawyer/Art and photo Ryn Gargulinski

Follow some easy tips to get your pumpkin ready for our photo contest.

Picking

Avoid pumpkins that are mushy, stinky or have big slashes that ooze out innards. Opt for one that sounds like a wooden skull when you knock on it.

You can pick your pumpkins from an over-priced roadside stand or a run-of-the-mill supermarket where they cost about $5 each.

Supermarket pumpkins should be taken through the self=checkout, where the correct price code will invariably not be keyed into the system. This allows you to hold up the line while people behind you with a single half-gallon of milk shuffle their feet and sigh loudly.

Sawyer liked Phoebe's pumpkin enough to eat/Art and photo Ryn Gargulinski — Sawyer says Phoebe's pumpkin was good enough to eat/Art and photo Ryn Gargulinski

Painting

Even though paint can stick to your thigh for weeks on end, it’s still less messy than the carving. Painters tape is helpful to keep the paint where you want it. Either make a border around the eyes, nose, mouth and hair or do a “reverse negative” effect like I did with the Sawyer and Phoebe pumpkins.

Spray paint is a good choice, or you can use paint markers or those large graffiti markers that make your head spin when you sniff them.

Spray with sealer to deter dogs.

Carving

Before you even think of carving a pumpkin, you need to properly prepare. Thoroughly mop, scour and disinfect the floor and general area where you’ll be working, then cover it with an inadequate amount of newspaper. This way you can fret and swear when the pumpkin guts spew all over and ruin everything you just cleaned.

AZMouse's infamous Sarah Palin pumpkin and two others/submitted photo

Get yourself one of those chintzy Pumpkin Carving Kits with little blades and cheap plastic handles so you can swear some more when they break.

Draw your design with pencil on the pumpkin so you can erase any remaining lines. Then carve away.

Begin by cutting a circle around the stem so you can scoop out the innards. Painstakingly clean all the stringy guts off the seeds then bake the seeds on a cookie sheet for some fine snacks. Swear some more when no one wants to eat them because you burnt them to high heaven and forgot to add salt.

Finish off your carving by carefully cutting along those pencil lines you drew. Throw everything into a compost heap – except your finished pumpkin – then display proudly on the porch until someone runs off with it to smash it in the middle of the street.

Happy Halloween.

Phoebe refrained from eating the pumpkins. Good girl./Art and photo Ryn Gargulinski

Pumpkin decorating contest

Send us your pumpkin pictures for our decorating contest. All types of pumpkin art welcome. Entries will be showcased on Rynski’s Blogski. Please e-mail to rynski@tucsoncitizen.com

Photos must be received by Saturday, Oct. 31 – Halloweeeeeen!

Winner gets a lifetime supply of burnt, unsalted pumpkin seeds or Rynart, whichever Sawyer says.

What’s the worse pumpkin decorating experience you ever had? The best?

Are you into smashing pumpkins? Shame on you.

sawyer

Footer

Stay in the loop