With Friday the 13th nestled nicely on the calendar, some folks will cower in fear, others won’t even notice the day and still others will call all superstitions a bunch of hooey.

Illustration Ryn Gargulinski

Sure, many superstitions are all in fun – knock wood – but others truly shield us from harm, even if they never started out that way.

They have become practical rules to stay safe – or even stay alive.

On the superstitious side, walking under a ladder is bad luck because it breaks the triangle of life.

That fragile triangle is created by the ladder’s rungs, the ground and whatever the ladder is leaning against. Break that triangle of life by barging through its center and you’re taking your fate into your own hands.

On the practical side, walking under a ladder is bad luck because of all the stuff that could fall on you. Paint cans, nail pails, gutter cleaning apparatuses – even the ladder itself – could come tumbling down while you’re beneath it, killing you instantly.

One woman’s skull was nearly shattered by a hammer that fell from a ladder.

Don’t step on a crack unless you want to break your mother’s back – or unless you yourself wish to get injured or killed.

OK, an uneven sidewalk is more likely to stub your toe than strike you dead. But you could feasibly trip on that unnoticed crack and go toppling into traffic. This, of course, would immediately result in being crushed by a bus on its way to Topeka.

Stepping on a crack is also dangerous in a number of situations besides on the sidewalk. Broken ice, creaky attic floors and earthquake fault lines all contain cracks that could be fatal.

Illustration Ryn Gargulinski

Step on a crack near a manhole or those rusty cellar doors found on urban streets and you could find yourself head over heels in the bowels of the city. Or at least in the basement of a rat-infested eatery.

Open an umbrella indoors and you’re inviting bad luck to rain down on you. People originally feared such an action would stir the wrath of the sun god.

On the safety side, opening an umbrella in the small confines of a home can also shoot one of those pokey spokes through a nearby eyeball or even all the way through a brain.

You also have a good chance of knocking over some expensive and irreplaceable knickknack. This feat could incite the wrath of the knickknack’s owner, which could be even more deadly than the ire the sun god.

Anyone who doubts this fact should try knocking over and breaking his mother’s favorite vase.

Not covering your mouth when you yawn or sneeze is another way to beckon death.

The original reasoning behind the mouth covering was to either keep evil spirits out of your body or to keep your own soul from escaping, both of which led to an untimely demise.

Today’s super germs, contagious diseases and kids on the bus to Topeka who like to poke fingers down your gullet keep covering your mouth a necessity.

Sometimes anti-bacterial soap is just not enough for us to stay healthy and alive.

[tnipoll]


Ryn Gargulinski is a poet, artist, performer and TucsonCitizen.com Ryngmaster who never kills spiders because she likes them and never steps on cracks because she saw a man fall into a cellar. Her column appears every Friday on Rynski’s Blogski. Her art, writing and more is at RynRules.com and Rynski.Etsy.com. E-mail rynski@tucsoncitizen.com.

What’s your favorite superstition? Your least favorite?

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